On October 7, 1982 a little feline-centric Broadway musical made its debut on the Great White Way. Cats came from prolific music man Andrew Lloyd Webber, based on some iconic poems by T.S. Eliot. It was an instant smash and would go on to become the longest running show in Broadway history (for a spell). Why then, did it take 37 years to bring it to the big screen?
Perhaps the answer lies in what those passionate fans received under their Christmas tree this year from director Tom Hooper. Cats comes off like a catnip induced fever dream with little in terms of what made it such a beloved classic in musical theater form. Perhaps some properties just don’t make good movies. It happens. The stage play or musical theatrical experience is a unique one and as such, taking one medium and applying its story sensibilities to another reminds of that old crossing the streams is bad thing from Ghostbusters.
See, Hooper is a solid helmer (The King’s Speech won Best Picture!) and no stranger to crafting musical movies that mirror the power of the stage where they were born. Les Misérables is a perfect example. Yet with Cats—from the get-go—viewers presented with a puzzling sequence that will bridge with another baffling cinematic choice and by the conclusion it’s a fragile linked thread of decently crafted musical numbers held together by the frailest of feline storylines.
Victoria (Francesca Hayward) is abandoned. The kitten is dropped off in the “cat” part of town (hey, there’s no other explanation given to why this part of London is littered with feral kitties) and immediately she draws the attention of a group of fellow homeless souls who sing her a song that is supposed to simultaneously introduce us to this world and tell Victoria in no uncertain terms what she is now, Jellicle Songs for Jellicle Cats. It’s classic Webber, but somehow in its delivery here on celluloid, much is lost in its purpose. Then, she is asked for her name and that elicits The Naming of Cats, a separate musical number that instead feels like Jellicle Part 2 the way its produced, choreographed and executed.
The thing is, it would be easy to go through the song list and dissect why each fails to move the needle dramatically, or even aesthetically for that matter. But that would be as boring as much of the film itself. What can be stated is that many of these tracks are individually entertaining and taken out of context, are solid musical numbers. The painful part arrives because there is no cohesion between the songs. They are delivered by characters that do not appear to share any connection, as laid out by the script, other than they share proximity to one another when it’s their time to belt out some Broadway musical numbers. It’s a shame, because songs like Growltiger’s Last Stand are rather riveting. Like it is in any genre of film (or any type of storytelling means, for that matter), if there is no context established or richness attached to characters, there is nothing for an audience to grasp onto.
The crux of what is going on in Cats is that it’s that time of year where Old Deuteronomy (Dame Judi Dench) conducts a contest where the winner gets to ascend to “The Heaviside Layer” and the promise of a better life. Each pussycat sings, Old ‘D takes it all in and eventually, anoints the victor. It’s kind of a big deal. Yet again, because why “Heaviside” is so appealing is never once established or even explained. Like so much in Cats, the audience is just supposed to go along for the ride and never question what it is we’re even doing. I’d say it was a film geared directly for those who have seen the stage production, due to the overwhelming lack of exposition of any kind. But I’ve seen the musical on the hardwood floors of a theater and there was still so much confusion and time spent being lost.
Cats possesses one of the most stunning ensembles of the year, but it would probably have served the production as a whole a bit better if Hooper had used Broadway stars that are not as familiar to the masses. With the costumes, makeup and CG employed to wiggle cat ears and furrowed brows, one spends too much time basking in the realization that, “wow, that’s Idris Elba as the villain,” that we never truly get the chance to focus on what it is he is singing about in the first place. The production went with a relative unknown for its lead character, Victoria, they should have done that right on down the line. Then again, who says no to casting Taylor Swift, Ian McKellen, Rebel Wilson, James Corden, Jason Derulo and Jennifer Hudson? No one, that’s who!
Each of those talents has their moment in the sun and some work better than others, most notably Hudson and her Grizabella. That should be shocking to absolutely no one, given her commanding pipes, screen presence and power to deliver seismic songs that rival what was delivered on the stage on Broadway or on the West End of London. Just like she did in Dreamgirls (and won an Oscar), Hudson has a single song that defines her character and the former American Idol contestant delivers it in such a way that tears will surely be streaming down your face. Simply hearing her belt out Memories should be worth the price of admission. But give it a few weeks and the track will be on YouTube.
McKellen and Dench even sing, and who knew either could? Actually … we still don’t because each more speak-sings than anything else. Then, there’s Derulo. If you have had any ear to the musical landscape of the last decade, his singing prowess is hardly a surprise and what he does with The Rum Tum Tugger is downright electric. But it’s lost in a sea of mediocrity on so many other levels that it becomes an afterthought in the recollection of the Cats experience.
For what it’s worth, Hayward is a find. Her dance background behooved her as there is a grace to her cat-ness that is priceless. She is the Principal ballerina at The Royal Ballet, who has added actress to her resume. Oh, and that voice—it’s like an angel.
The thing with Cats is it might have worked better during the era from which it debuted. If a Cats movie had been made in the mid to late 80s, so much of what ails this production would have felt perfect for the time period. Instead, we have a cinematically savvy crowd who have experienced epic musical movie moments like what Baz Luhrmann gave us with Moulin Rouge!, Damien Chazelle’s La La Land and yes, even the James Lapine penned 2012 stage to screen Into the Woods from Rob Marshall (who also helmed the Best Picture winning Chicago).
Timing is everything in this business, as it is in life itself, frankly. Perhaps it took so long to bring Cats to the screen because there wasn’t an interest in it for decades. Then, with the cavalcade of movie musicals that score with audiences and awards, suddenly producers were seeking any kind of musical with name recognition (always a plus in Hollywood). There are few bigger names in musical theater than Cats. But just as producers painfully discovered with Charlie’s Angels and Terminator: Dark Fate, visiting three-decade-plus old properties for today’s audiences has become a fool’s errand.
Grade: C-